Alright Fate Grand Order. Let’s End This Already…

Oh, the beloved Fate series. Spanning light novels, video games, anime, movies, massive amounts of porn, and apps this behemoth is very adept at milking EVERY PENNY IT POSSIBLY CAN. Encompassing strategy, romance, action, adventure fantasy, and more this is the series that, whether you like it or not, just keeps on giving.

Recently, the FGO app was released for the USA and, after playing it for 5ish days, I’m here to give my uninformed, unwanted and ultimately shallow opinion. As a disclaimer, the only other games I’ve played that were similar were some of the Fire Emblem games. Ok, fine. One Fire Emblem game. For 6 days.

Here’s my¬†quick¬†review. I HAVE A BERSERKER TAMAMO CAT AND SHE SAID WE WERE LIKE HUSBAND AND WIFE ONE TIME. HELL YEAH! 10/10 would marry again. Oh, er, buy again. It’s free anyway. Only an impatient maniac would spend money on this game and there’s literally nothing to lose except time and pieces of yourself, in an increasingly empty pit of sadness and anxiety, but that was probably going to happen anyway!

Can you see the difference? I sure can’t.

I’m not a huge fan of this kind of game. I play for usually a week before I lose most of my interest. Comparing this to Fire Emblem though, I definitely prefer the former. While I find the story of FGO way more interesting (although a little too much dialogue at times), I also think the combat is too slow even with the battle speed increased. Replaying a stage 3-10 times and having 3 rounds of fights in each stage, for some reason, just doesn’t get me hot and bothered like it’s supposed to. Also, I think craft essences are complete bullshit. If I’m spending my hard-earned crystals to do a summoning then why, in God’s name, would I want a minor stat boost instead? In general, I find that collecting the crystals is much too laborsome whereas Fire Emblem Heroes was handing me servants left and right like I was a pair of knees doing that one move in the Charleston dance.

The game is fun though. I like the voice acting and the sounds. The battle mechanics are recycled but that’s because they work and are reliable. The nature of the game makes it pretty exciting too because you get to battle with historical figures like King Arthur, Mozart, Jeanne D’Arc, and a lot more. The noble phantasms are pretty cool to watch and just using ‘command spells’, even if they do regenerate once a day, makes you feel like a god bending the rules of reality to your whim.

I just really like my Berserker, Tamamo Cat. That’s really all this is.




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